I am a huge fan of whole wheat pita – I love making my own pita chips, and I also love just eating plain old wedges with hummus, olives and feta cheese (my all-time favorite lunch combination) .  I suppose you could use them for sandwiches, but I can never seem to keep from punching holes in them while stuffing them. Which of course renders them useless as food vessels. So, I’m content to eat them dipped and unstuffed.

This recipe came from Cooking Light magazine (best food mag out there, with Cook’s Illustrated coming in a close second), March 2009 issue (so, yikes, I’ve had that recipe for almost THREE years! Now, I’m REALLY surprised I didn’t lose it). The pitas came out fairly well. I do think it’s a recipe I’d have to try again a few time before getting the hang of it.

Recipe, results, and photos after the jump. As usual, my notes are in blue.

******************

Fresh Whole-Wheat Pitas

Yield: 8 servings (serving size: 1 pita)

Recipe from Cooking Light magazine, March 2009 (click the link to get a printable version)

Ingredients

• 1 tablespoon sugar
• 1 package dry yeast (about 2 ¼ teaspoons)
• 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons warm water (100° to 110°)
• 10 ounces bread flour (about 2 ¼ cups)
• 4 ¾ ounces white whole-wheat flour (about 1 cup), divided (King Arthur Flour makes a great version)
• 2 tablespoons 2% Greek-style yogurt (I only had nonfat, which seemed to work just fine)
• 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
• ¾ teaspoon salt
• Olive oil cooking spray

Preparation

Dissolve sugar and yeast in 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons warm water in a large bowl; let stand 5 minutes. Weigh or lightly spoon flours into dry measuring cups; level with a knife. Add bread flour, 3 ounces (about ¾ cup) whole-wheat flour, yogurt, oil, and salt to the yeast mixture; beat with a mixer at medium speed until smooth. Turn the dough out onto a floured surface. Knead dough until smooth and elastic (about 10 minutes); add enough of remaining whole-wheat flour, 1 tablespoon at a time, to prevent dough from sticking to hands – dough will feel sticky. (I really had to restrain myself from adding more flour at this point – the dough was stickier than I am used to. It was difficult, but I decided to trust the recipe.)

Really, really sticky.

Place dough in a large bowl coated with cooking spray, turning to coat top. Cover and let rise in a warm place (85°), free from drafts, for 45 minutes or until doubled in size.

Position the oven rack on the lowest shelf. Preheat the oven to 500°.

Divide dough into 8 portions. Working with one portion at a time, gently roll each portion into a 5 ½-inch circle.

I used a kitchen scale to weigh these portions - about 3 ounces each.

Place 4 dough circles on each of 2 baking sheets heavily coated with cooking spray. Bake, 1 sheet at a time, at 500° for 8 minutes or until puffed and browned. Cool on a wire rack. (These really only need about 5-6 minutes to bake. The first few that I baked for 8 minutes nearly burned. Best just to watch).

One of the puffy almost-burned ones.

I was poking around The Joy of Cooking (my favorite cookbook), and found a recipe for Oatmeal Molasses Bread, which I adapted. It wasn’t too difficult, and produced great results (with some tweaking that I’ll explain in blue). Recipe and photos after the jump.

*********************

Oatmeal-Flax Molasses Bread (you can find a printable version here)

Combine in a medium saucepan:

• 1 ½ cups water
• 1 cup steel-cut or rolled oats
• 1 tablespoon butter
• ¾ teaspoon salt

Cook, stirring occasionally, over medium-low heat until oatmeal is soft, smooth, thick and free of lumps (about 20 minutes). Let cool, stirring occasionally, until tepid and no warmer than 115°.

Combine in a large mixing bowl or the bowl of a heavy-duty mixer and let stand until yeast is dissolved, about 5 minutes:

• 1 package (2 ¼ teaspoons) active dry yeast
• ¼ cup warm water (105-115°)

Add to the yeast the oatmeal mixture along with:

• ½ cup room temperature water
• 1/3 cup molasses

Stir until well blended. Whisk the following together, and gradually stir in until the dough is moist and not sticky:

• 3 ¾ cups to 4 cups all-purpose flour
• ¼ cup ground flax seed (this was not in the original recipe – I added it for fun and Omega-3′s)

Let’s stop here for a moment.
This is where I began to distrust the recipe a bit.  After adding 4 cups of flour, the dough wasn’t just moist or sticky, it was loose and runny, slightly thicker than dumpling batter. I was pretty sure I wasn’t get to get good sandwich bread from such a loose batter. So, I kept adding flour until the dough no longer stuck to the bowl. I didn’t measure, but I added at least another cup and a half. At least.  It was also at this point that I added about a tablespoon of whole flax seeds and the same amount of uncooked oatmeal, both for texture.   Onward.

Knead the dough for 10 to 15 minutes, either by hand or on a low-medium setting on your mixer with a dough hook. Then, transfer the dough to an oil coated bowl. Turn the dough a time or two to coat it with oil. Cover the dough with a damp kitchen towel and leave it in a warm place to rise for 1 ½ hours. Once it is doubled in volume, punch down the dough and knead briefly. Divide the dough in half and roll each piece into a loose loaf shape on an floured work surface. Cover and let rest for 30 minutes (I actually forgot this resting step and it turned out fine)

.

Loaves before panning. Notice the cute little flax seeds tucked in there!

Form the dough into free standing loaves, or place them seam-side down in oiled bread pans. Cover loosely with the damp towel, and let the dough rise in a warm place for another 1 ½ hours until doubled in volume.

In the pan, prior to the egg wash.

Preheat oven to 375°. If you’re making free-form loaves, slash the tops before baking. I topped my loaves with an egg wash and a sprinkling of oatmeal and flax seeds.

Bake until the bottoms of the loaves sound hollow when tapped, 40-45 minutes. You can also use an intant read thermometer to tell if they’re done – 190° is the right temperature.  Remove from pans to a rack and let cool for at least 30 minutes before serving.

Done and smelling fantastic.

Results:

• It wasn’t dry! I was a little worried after adding all that extra flour, but it turned out to be the right thing to do. The crumb was perfect for a sandwich bread, and very moist.
• The crust was a little chewier than I normally like. Might have been because of the egg wash.
• My spontaneous addition of the ground flax seed turned out great. I don’t really taste it, but I know it’s providing me with Omega-3 fatty acids that I don’t get in my normal diet (I hate oily fish).
• Adding the whole flax seeds and oatmeal was a great idea (thank you very much). I love breads with texture, and the seeds and oats give the bread heartiness.
• There’s a nice dark molasses taste, not overwhelming but just enough to give it depth and a slight sweetness.
• This would make an ideal bread for sandwiches, or even just slathered with butter. Highly recommended.

Again, I’d like to mention that you can find a printable version of this recipe by clicking here. If you decide to make it yourself, please let me know what you think of the recipe and any thoughts you have about improving it.

And, just as obviously, if I’m going to write about it here it has to be something that would be of interest to others; really, no one cares about my progress if I pledge to get out of bed fifteen minutes earlier each day (though, I really should think about fighting that battle).

As I was contemplating what my 2012 project should be, I recalled something a wise man once tweeted:

“Resolutions don’t work. Replace them with rituals. Rituals work.”

A pleasurable Sunday ritual for me is bread making. Extended time spent in the kitchen, meditative actions, fantastic aromas filling the house, and delicious results. Nothing but love going on there. And I truly enjoy sharing the fruits of my labor with others – breaking bread, so to speak.  So my 2012 project is going to be to try one new bread recipe per week, and sharing the recipe and experience here with you. With photos, because even though I’m not very good at taking pictures, I do enjoy taking pics of food!

I’m going to try recipes from cookbooks I already have first – especially The Joy of Cooking, Barefoot Contessa at Home, and Baking Illustrated. I’m also open to any recommendations, suggestions, or family favorites you might want to share. I’ll try anything – high fiber, quick breads, gluten-free, vegan, you name it. I may even try to create something original, based on reader suggestions. I’ve got 52 opportunities, and I think this is going to be fun!

First bread, made today – Oatmeal Molasses Bread. It’s in the oven right now (it smells fantastic), so you can expect a post with photos tomorrow!

Happy New Year to you and your family. I hope you have a delicious 2012.

I didn't make these - these beautiful loaves were made by Our Daily Bread, one of the vendors at Schenectady Greenmarket. I took this photo last winter.

My culinary odyssey is presented here in more-or-less chronological order.

DC3 - A while back, I had inquired about finding a Chicago-style hot dog in the 518. I did get a couple referrals, but I never followed up. So when Sarah asked if it would be okay if we got hot dogs for lunch on Friday, I jumped at the chance. DC-3 is a one-off little joint, with a large menu and a small seating area. Of course, I ordered the Chicago 7: all beef dog, poppy seed bun, tomato, pickle spear, “nuclear green relish” (they aren’t kidding – that stuff is day-glo green), onions, sport peppers, yellow mustard, and celery salt.  It was terrific. Those sport peppers pack quite a kick (you can see one tucked in there near the bottom left), and the pickle spear is a weird but welcome topping. I loved it. I got a side of fried pickles, which were pretty great – nice and tangy.

This was very, very messy.

On Sunday, while Sarah was out at a baby shower, I made a return visit to DC-3, and tried a Tucson Sonoran dog (bacon-wrapped dog, buttered bun, pinto beans, onions, diced tomatoes, white spicy mayo, jalapeno relish, mustard). It was not as tasty, and about 10x messier than the Chicago 7.  And it was sufficient fuel for the Oprah LifeClass marathon I sat (and cried) through that afternoon.

There’s more. A lot more. After the jump.

The Sweet Lobby – where I had my first macaron (properly spoken with a gravelly French accent). A religious experience, almost. I only recently became aware of the existence of these little delights, but was put off by the mania that has begun to surround them (much like that of my nemesis the cupcake). I was fully prepared to be underwhelmed by the experience. I could not have been more wrong. The selection at the shop was vast – they had probably 12-15 varieties from which to choose. After much deliberation and guidance from Sarah and the shopworker, I selected two: Hazelnut Praline Salted Caramel, and Pumpkin Black Sesame.

Heavenly, heavenly bites...

I thought the cookie would be crisp and chalky, like a traditional meringue (probably my most hated sensation). Instead, it was chewy and delicate. The filling was intense and ethereal, its flavor fading quickly and leaving me wanting more. I had remarked to Sarah that upon entering the phone-booth size shop (seriously – the place could really only hold about 5 people, tops) I wanted to buy approximately 8 dozen macarons. They were so beautiful, and looked so incredible.  But, she reminded me of their price. Sometimes I get carried away when I see sweets. Anyway, I’ve been dreaming about them ever since. I hear that one of my favorite local merchants, Dreampuff Marshmallows, makes macarons. She is also a vendor at the Schenectady Greenmarket (and the Troy Riverfront Farmers Market), so I’m hoping I can score some right here at home.

Busboys & Poets – we only had time to stop in for a quick beer and hummus plate, before we had to run to catch a play at the Capital Fringe Festival (Sarah’s friend Michael Merino wrote an odd – and amusing – play entitled “Squirrel, or the Origin of a Species”, which is essentially a series of conversations between Charles Darwin and an American Gray Squirrel. Yes, it was as weird as it sounds.) The menu was intrigiung – lots of vegetarian and vegan offerings, in domestic and ethnic varieties. I hope to get back here on a future trip – hint!

Fort Fringe - this is the theatre space where we saw the show. The venue itself was unremarkable – your standard black box with rickety stairs and dangerous, not-up-to-fire-code seating.  But the bar had PROSECCO ON TAP! What?!? No kidding. Yeah, it was pretty cool.

Kushi – After the play, we lingered around a bit until we finally decided to get some dinner. We ended up at a Japanese place in Mt. Vernon Square, which surprised me by actually being open that late (yes, I know, I’m from Upstate NY, where stuff closes at 9pm). It featured small (small!) plates, and we each ordered a couple things. The idea was to share, but the plates were so small that sharing was actually kinda difficult. I know that sounds very fat-American of me, but I am a cheapskate, and I really didn’t feel like there was a whole lot of value there. Anyway, I ordered a delicious soba noodle salad (fresh soba, with a splash of rice vinegar, soy, and some fresh greens), and an order of chicken breast skewers with shiso & plum sauce. The mixture of shiso and plum was transcendent – flowery, pungent, green, not at all sweet. It was unlike anything I’d ever had before.  More, please! Maybe give me two orders next time.

Chick-Fil-A – At one point, Sarah had mentioned that she loved the sandwiches at Chick-Fil-A, which took me aback. Sarah and I are both socially liberal, and I was surprised she would patronize a company which supports anti-gay organizations. She is, to her credit, conflicted by the fact that such a bad company makes such good chicken. I kept kidding her about it  (calling it Chicken and Hate) until she made me stop at one so I could understand why she would set aside her convictions long enough to eat their food. Grudgingly, I have to admit she is absolutely right. The original chicken sandwich was terrific, and simple – fried chicken breast on a buttered bun with pickles (we were in the South; butter goes on everything). I really did like it. Their waffle fries were not that good – undercooked and underseasoned – but, oh that chicken. It’s a good thing that chain isn’t here in the Northeast.  A nice touch: the bible verse on the receipt.

Argonaut – with Sarah and Joanne for Sunday brunch, something I just never do anymore, for some reason. I knew nothing about this place before Sarah suggested it, but I woke up that morning craving a Bloody Mary – apparently I was having some sort of premonition, because The Argonaut has an actual freakin’ BLOODY MARY BAR.  They bring you out a pint glass that has some ice and vodka in it, and you hie yourself over to the bar and help yourself to tomato juice, twenty different kinds of hot sauce, horseradish, celery salt, pepper, Old Bay seasoning, lemons, limes, and giant stalks of celery. I have never tended a bar, so I really had no idea of a Bloody Mary recipe, so I kind of just poured a bunch of stuff I like in the shaker. I made a huge mess. I did not return to the scene of the crime. Sarah enjoyed a bottomless Mimosa and tried valiantly to find the bottom, to no avail. Oh, also we ate some stuff that I don’t remember.

Hello Cupcake! – I know, I know. I hate cupcakes. I have no excuse. I bought two: Dulce de Leche and Maple Bacon Pecan. They were quite lovely. The Maple Bacon Pecan one did not actually have any bacon flavor in it, at least that I could detect. Perhaps Sarah’s experience was different. That’s all I’m going to say about cupcakes.

Founding Farmers – A very popular restaurant that my friend MEB suggested – she’s a frequent DC traveler, but hasn’t made it to FF yet, and thought it was something I might like. She was right. Founding Farmers has a goal of “promot[ing] sustainable agriculture and the ways of the American family farmer at every turn,” and “quality and natural ingredients.”  They don’t always buy local and organic, though – sure, if it makes sense, but they are mostly on the lookout for high quality ingredients from sustainable resources. And they buy carbon offsets in case the food sources are not all that local. A nice philosophy.

We started with an appetizer of Proscuitto, Fig & Mascarpone flatbread- so many delicious things going on there: fresh creamy cheese, fatty prosciutto, tangy balsamic vinegar, and sweet figs. We also got a bottle of Arbanta Tempranillo from Rioja, which was outstanding.  Sarah got a skirt steak with chimichurri (which looked good, but I did not taste it) and I ordered the Macaroni & Cheese with Gouda, Gruyere, ham, peas, & apples. The apples really put that over the top – so so good. I can’t remember if we ordered dessert. I don’t think we did, but we did finish the bottle of wine.

Mitsitam at the National Museum of the American Indian – We stopped there for lunch before I hopped the airport shuttle. The cafeteria is unlike other museum cafeterias, in that it serves interesting food – in this case, traditional offerings from several different American Indian geographical regions.  I went for the  cuisine of the Great Plains, and ordered a Chipotle Chicken Taco. I wanted it because it was made with fry bread, which looked so fresh and fluffy. I was also not really feeling particularly well that day, and there wasn’t anything else I really felt like eating. The fry bread seemed so soft and comforting. It turned out to be the best part of the dish – the chipotle chicken was so mild, there was not even a hint of heat. And it was topped with boring cheddar, lettuce and tomato. Eh. Not really worth $11.50. Sarah’s New England Lobster Bread Pudding (and her blueberry cobbler) looked delicious, but I didn’t even feel like trying it. Like I said, I was not well. The best part of this lunch was the fact that Sarah’s teeth were stained blue for the rest of the day.

Free Wine from Southwest Airlines – the end of a long trip. I boarded my flight home and was towards the end of the second boarding group, so seating choices were slim. I headed to the back of the plane (“the back of the plane gets there at the same time as the front” sez Sarah), and somehow managed to find an aisle seat. I was just settling in when I noticed a woman and her daughter, maybe 7 years old, trying to find a couple seats together. The mom told the daughter to sit in the seat next to me (the middle), while she would head back a few rows for another middle seat. I didn’t think the mom would want her kid to be sitting alone, so I offered up my aisle seat and took the lone middle seat in the back. The flight attendant saw me, and told me that since I was so nice, she was going to buy me a drink. A guy in the back yelled, “What’d she do? Can I do it, too?”  I still wasn’t feeling so hot, but who am I to turn down free Merlot? Thanks, SW.

Wow. Looking back on my weekend away, I am noticing that I ate a lot. A LOT a lot. No wonder I wasn’t feeling well that last day. Back to the gym I go.

*****

Other good things that happened on this trip: met someone who possesses the same superpower I do, got to see Joanne and new baby Lilah, and FINALLY got down to Richmond to see parents-to-be Marlene and Chris. It was a pretty fantastic weekend.

Updated: now with more photos!

Spaghetti Ice Cream, featured at the Tulsa State Fair

I see it’s fair season once again. That explains why local newspapers and my Google Reader are filled to overflowing with announcements about rabbit tattoo clinics, has-been-bands-from-the-70′s-with-only-one-remaining-original-member on the main stage, and of course – things getting deep fried.  Which means it’s time for my annual fair post.

(Oops. My apologies. The has-been bands aren’t appearing at fairs – they’re in downtown Albany).

Amongst the flurry of press releases and news stories, a few things caught my eye:

• The Schoharie County Sunshine Fair is quite pleased with its new horse digs.  From its website:

Last year as you may know, we have erected a 240′ x 120′ horse arena cover. Since September of last year we have replaced all of our original footing and all the horse shows that have used it are more than satisfied.

• At the Bangor State Fair in Maine, escape artist Michael Griffin has issued a challenge – anyone who can tie him up with rope in a way that he can’t escape will walk home with $1000.
• The Ohio State Fair‘s traditional butter sculpture of a cow and calf will be accompanied by a greasy tribute to the now-defunct Space Shuttle program: a floating astronaut and an intricately-carved space shuttle cockpit.
• The Iowa State Fair (“Nothing Compares”) also has a butter sculpture of a cow – cleverly named The Butter Cow – but this year, they’re adding an altruistic twist: a can sculpture to benefit the food insecure (I think they meant to say “hungry”). Thousands of canned goods will be used to create replicas of said Butter Cow, a milk carton, and a market hog, all frolicking in a canny field of corn and soybeans. Sorry, no picture yet – the Iowa State Fair doesn’t open til August 11.
• Our very own Great New York State Fair has announced that among its food offerings this year will be a diet-crippling burger that tips the scales at 1500 calories. The gut-busting “Big Kahuna Donut Burger” is a half-pound patty topped with cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato, and onions, all sandwiched between two grilled glazed donuts. Yawn. We’ve seen these before (here, here and here). The website says “only at the Great New York State Fair.”  That’s not even *kinda* true.
• The Minnesota State Fair features “Walleye on a Stick”, an homage to the ubiquitous ichthyoid found in its 10,000 lakes. I’ll pass.
• Missouri’s State Fair has a handy online “Food Finder” which allowed me to track down these gems:
• Big Fat Bacon – a one-third pound slice of bacon fried and carmelized with maple syrup, served on-a-stick with dipping sauces
• Spam Burgers – breakfast sandwiches (Spam, egg and cheese), grilled open face Spamwiches, Spam hot dogs, Spam chili dogs, Spamburgers (fried Spam served on a bun with cheese and/or pineapple), Spam curds (Spam and cheese battered and deep fried), and possibly Spam eggs sausage & Spam (that’s not got much spam in it)
• Scotch-Eggs-on-a-Stick – hard boiled egg, wrapped in sausage, rolled in bread crumbs and deep fried
• Alligator Three Ways – Seasoned alligator sausage on-a-stick, smoked or barbecue alligator ribs, fried alligator legs
• And, not to be outdone by any damn Yankees, the State Fair of Texas features Fried Beer™, a ravioli-like pastry that spills out beer when bitten.  Creator Mark Zable won Most Creative in the fair’s 2010 Big Tex Choice Awards concessionaire contest.

Sounds like food purveyors across the nation are looking for new and innovative ways to kill us all.

This is everything that's wrong with America

More photos after the jump…

Eh. Just another donut burger

Spamburger. Why?

Big Fat Bacon. This doesn't look all that bad, actually.

Fried Alligator Leg. No thank you.

This is what fried beer looks like. Now you know.

Walleye on a Stick.

Here are some of my recent favorites, exactly as entered into a search engine:

• “spider eating people”
• “wasp doughnut”
• “frog lips”

OK, those first three I understand, since I used to do those “Disgusting Food Item of the Week” posts (which are due to make a comeback). But the rest of these?

• “new born magets” – I believe they were going for “maggots”. Or perhaps “magnets”?
• “ledge rock llamas and woodside weavers” – um, what?
• “Elston lips on a man” – I have no freaking idea, but I’m a little frightened.
• “hot asshole” – Again, no clue.
• “crying while eating hot dog” – I do that all the time.
• “pimple that looks like a barnacle” - I sure don’t remember writing anything about that.
• “wine sticker cat” – Huh?
• “Do jews eat liverwurst” – I don’t know.  Shout out to my Jewish friends: do you?
• “Jim Tedisco” – Wow. He’ll show up anywhere, won’t he?

I can't believe he managed to get a photo op on my blog. He's that good.

1. This one is a video of the world’s first CHOCOLATE PRINTER. Just think of the things you could make with this! I love technology.

2. This one is a stop-motion animation of a Spanish-language song called “Chocolate”, which uses chocolate, handmade cookies, and other food like eggs, milk and candy. Awesome!

Hope you have a delicious weekend!

This thing gave me scars, both inside and out.

I just received a shocking piece of news: the Easy-Bake Oven, storied toy from my childhood, will be no more.  Or, at least, no more the way it was.  And we have energy-saving tree-huggers and politicians to thank for it.

As you may know, incandescent light bulbs are going the way of the dodo, with the United States adopting more stringent energy-efficiency standards for light bulbs (the standards will be phased in from 2012-2014) .  Though incandescents aren’t being outlawed per se, it is unlikely that they will be able to meet those new efficiency requirements (roughly 25% increase in efficiency), effectively banning the general purpose incandescent lighting that most of us use.

But, sadly, it’s that very energy-inefficiency (i.e., wanton and blatant heat production) of a standard 100-watt incandescent bulb that allowed the Easy-Bake oven to work its magic and cook those tasty little cakes. 

Fact of the day: Approximately 90% of the power consumed by an incandescent light bulb is emitted as heat, rather than as visible light.

According to a recent press release from Hasbro, Inc., maker of the Easy-Bake Oven,

“We are aware that the 100-watt incandescent light bulb will no longer be available beginning in 2012. In Fall 2011, Hasbro will launch the Easy Bake Ultimate Oven, introducing a new way to bake for the next generation of chefs. This new oven features a heating element that does not use a light bulb and offers an extensive assortment of mixes reflective of the hottest baking trends for today.”

“Easy-Bake Ultimate Oven”.  Whatever.  It’s no fun if there’s not a chance of getting second-degree light bulb burns.

Sweet, sweet nectar. Bringing joy, erasing memories.

I love these random food-related holidays. There’s nothing to commemorate, no cards to buy, no gifts to wrap.

And National Drink Wine Day is a holiday I can proudly stand behind.

So tonight, in celebration of NDWD and my bestie Sionna’s milestone birthday, I plan on raising a glass or two.

Are you planning on celebrating this important national holiday?

I was listening to an episode of KCRW’s Good Food this morning on my ride into work, and heard a segment about a food competition.  The details of segment itself are not relevant, but the chefs involved were creating some dishes that I was familiar with, yet had never attempted in my own kitchen.  Which then made me ask myself,

Why have you never tried making these things, woman?

I began to think about all of the techniques and classic recipes that I have never attempted – not because I don’t have the mad skillz (’cause I DO), but because I just never got around to them.  Or maybe they just seem too complicated.  Or perhaps they simply sound too ridiculous.

So, here’s my list, in no order of importance, of the techniques/recipes that I wish to learn:

Recipes/Foods:

• Clafouti
• Soufflé
• Crown Roast of Pork (Complete with paper panties.  On the roast.)
• Confit (not duck, though.  I don’t like duck.)
• Vichyssoise
• Meringue (Seriously.  I have never made a meringue.)
• Paella

Techniques:

• Deboning a whole chicken
• Charcuterie (I want to learn how to make salumi)
• Sushi-making
• Growing my own sourdough starter
• Canning

On the flipside, here are a few things that I can practically guarantee that I will never attempt or experience – because I think they are ridiculous and/or disgusting:

• Sous-vide
• Molecular Gastronomy (in the style of Ferran Adrià).  Give me a break with this nonsense.  And I’m speaking as a chemist.
• The brains of any animal
• Cooking a lobster
• Frogs, eels, snakes, worms, or bugs.  Never.

I”d love to hear your experiences with any items on my lists, or about things you’d like to try, or not try.

Never, never, never, never, never.