It’s always fun to peruse my site stats. I get to know how many people are reading the posts I write, and I find out which of my blogger friends are sending people my way (big hat tip to Daniel and Sarah). But perhaps my favorite thing is looking up the search terms that bring people to my blog. People will type literally ANYTHING into Google. And sometimes it leads them to yours truly.

Here are some of my recent favorites, exactly as entered into a search engine:

  • “spider eating people”
  • “wasp doughnut”
  • “frog lips”

OK, those first three I understand, since I used to do those “Disgusting Food Item of the Week” posts (which are due to make a comeback). But the rest of these?

  • “new born magets” – I believe they were going for “maggots”. Or perhaps “magnets”?
  • “ledge rock llamas and woodside weavers” – um, what?
  • “Elston lips on a man” – I have no freaking idea, but I’m a little frightened.
  • “hot asshole” – Again, no clue.
  • “crying while eating hot dog” – I do that all the time.
  • “pimple that looks like a barnacle” – I sure don’t remember writing anything about that.
  • “wine sticker cat” – Huh?
  • “Do jews eat liverwurst” – I don’t know.  Shout out to my Jewish friends: do you?
  • “Jim Tedisco” – Wow. He’ll show up anywhere, won’t he?
I hope you all found what you were looking for.  ‘Cause I’m pretty sure it wasn’t here.
I can't believe he managed to get a photo op on my blog. He's that good.