I wish people would stop complaining about US Customs and Border Protection. Keeping our borders safe is always a hot-button political issue, but I think we should all be able to sleep better tonight, knowing that agents are working around the clock, keeping our country safe and free of foreign bologna – for our children and our children’s children.
You heard me.
According to the Associated Press (and a mention on the CBP website), agents of the US Customs and Border Protection made an historic bust along the border near Santa Teresa, NM yesterday – seizing a whopping 385 pounds (nearly a fifth of a ton!) of contraband bologna, which the perp attempted to smuggle across the border by hiding it behind the front seat of his pickup truck. Just take a look at the stash:
Bologna is a restricted item, and is not allowed into the US because it’s made of pork and has the potential to introduce foreign animal diseases into the U.S. pork industry. Thankfully, agents were able to sniff out the offending forcemeat, and destroy it before any harm was done. The 33-year-old Mexican man who was transporting the meat was fined $1,000 fine and released.
Officials say it was the largest bologna bust ever recorded at the Santa Teresa crossing.
God Bless the pork industry, and God Bless the United States of America.
Which reminds me: do you prefer the spelling “bologna” or “baloney”?
Life at Goal 
That’s awesome. Good to know the government is looking out for our health! Not that I eat bologna, but who knows what other insidious lunchmeats are being smuggled into the country? I still don’t trust that “Canadian” bacon.
Now all America is deprived of having a delicious fried bologna sandwich. I feel sorry for all those people who have never experienced the joy of a fried bologna and ketchup sandwich-gourmet if you add a slice of cheese to it. The next time I buy bologna and make that sandwich, I will think of all those legal and illegal folks in the Southwestern US who can’t have one.
Yes, I do spell bologna (like the Oscar Meyer commercial) but I pronounce it baloney.
Bologna is the lunch meat.
Baloney is a slang term meaning not true, a load of crap, etc.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!